




The Pomorums are a tribe of True Types. All Pomorums live in houses with no Windows. The non user-friendly neighborhood tribe is the Macadamias. All Macadamians have Windows
in their houses. The Pomorums think only nuts have Windows! The Macadamians are a sneaky tribe of aliases and they carry little arrows.


Thus far, our wanderings have taken us all over the island. We decided to make a map to make it easier to keep track of where we've been, and to aid us in returning to our camp. We first came upon the Maze of Twisty Passages on our first day. This place reminded us of the way the Windows file systems are laid out, and as soon as we realized it, we decided this was not the place for us. We moved on the the Land of B-Trees, and it was good - so good in fact, that we vowed to return as soon as we'd mapped the rest of the island! Soon after, we stumbled upon the FDDI Zone. Everything here seemed to be invisible and slow, so we moved on. After that, our trek led us to the Mail Gateway; once we saw there were nothing but Unix and Windoze(tm) servers here, we decided our search couldn't be over yet. We came upon an Ethernet Backbone in our travels, and it supported tunneling via LocalTalk and EtherTalk, so we knew we were on the right track! Then we came to the LAN Bridge, and as we crossed it, we saw nothing but Apple Computers stretching off to the center of the island! The first few were old Apple II's, then came Lisas, the early Macintoshs were next, followed by the Plus', the SEs, and the like... There was a great glow coming from the center of the island and that's where we decided to head next.
We all discussed it as Trans4m was rrrrowling and mewling (we thought he was trying to tell us we *HAD* to go that way!), and we thought we might to find the Great MultiFinder icon there. But no... as we got closer and closer to the center of the island, we discovered something so amazing no one would ever believe us. We saw each new Mac to come for the next ten years (but were sworn to secrecy, so we can't tell you about that!). In the middle of a great blinding, flashing clearing, Steve Jobs was seated in a chair with wires and sensors attached to it. He was spasming and blubbering, cursing Bill Gates and Microsoft, Steve Balmer and the like, and saying things like, "Assimilate this, Billy-baby!" We realised the wires ran off to a small device that looked like a wristwatch, and the wristwatch thingy was sucking all the synapses out of Steve. Suddenly, it hit us - all this time, all he wanted to do was sell us a computer that mimiced his thought processes, his ability to grasp things simply, his ability to make analogies! This was to be his final attempt, literally sucking his essence out into a small device anyone could use and afford. We all were given copies of it, and we all wear them now. Steve talks to us, yes he does - every time we use our computers his thoughts guide us... we're all a little like Steve; all we want is simple yet elegant, easy to use things in our every day lives...

Kent
Schwarz
Denver Colorado,
Astronautics, Waterton Canyon
Acoutic and Vibration Lab Test Engineer
